NICELY SPOKEN!

Sir, As one of the many vintage enthusiasts left at the lights by Mr. S. F. M. notating, may I say that the expression he mistook for

annoyance was really one of perplexity. What possible satisfaction could there be in accelerating furiously to 90 m.p.h. in the ” 30 limit ? As a demonstration of the performance of a Martian roller skate, it might impress the inhabitants. of Betelgeuse, or efface the grin of the Man in the Moon. The driver will arrive at the next lights travelling too fast and slither to a stop, bowing and scraping to colourblind pedestrians who will be far too scared to appreciate the honour done them by such obeisance.

When Mr. B. goes billowing and swaying on his way, passing Mr. Vintagent, who has slowed down at. the dictates of road conditions, does he ever wonder what Mr. V. is thinking ? My guess is, that the French driver of a Type 43 Bugatti shrugs his shoulders, without deflecting the course of the Bug., at the thought of the mad Englishman who never lets up in his efforts to impress the foreigner with the sight of a G.B. plate, presented to his view at any angle but the horizontal, particularly on corners. The Italian at the wheel of his 2.3 Alfa is doubtless diverted by dangling dollies onthe Autostrada. If there was a posse of police patrolling the road to Malaga in Pegasos, it is hoped there was no model of a bathing belle flaunting her charms across the rear window of the A90. I am grateful to your correspondent and his ilk for preferring the modern (I avoid the embarrassing word). If they did not, the good vintage cars would be too expensive for some folk who can own and enjoy them for what they are, as well as for what they do. Here’s a problem. Suppose ” A ” is travelling along an inadequate English road at a steady 2,000 r.p.m. in his 3-litre which has recently been presented with the key of the garage door. Suppose B ” is doing a genuine 90 m.p.h. in the opposite direction along the same stretch of road, happy in the knowledge that his A90 could not care less when it will next get a drink. Suppose the 3-litre. remembering past indignities at the lights, decides he is allowed to be as far from the verge as the other fellow, and edges out a bit. Now for the final supposition, let there be an accident. No, not serious. No injuries, no police, thank goodness. What will the 3-litre’s driver do ? Drive on laughing, with slightly modified mudguard. What will the A90’s driver do ? I suspect he will regard the corrugations of the Spanish roads as insignificant beside the present state of his

metalware.

I hope the foregoing will not he regarded as a red herring drawn across the trail of the Citroen investigation. I read other motor papers for the advertisements, MoTon SPORT to learn the truth about cars. Most readers I talk to agree that it will be a grand thing when your paper appears weekly. I am, Yours, etc.,

Caterham. J. WILSON.